How was your Christmas? We have had a chaotic month for all of December. I unfortunately have been in and out of the Hospital (that’s why I’ve been a little sparse on Social Media). I actually had to miss a family Christmas because of everything that happened. But I am happy to say I was home for the Big one!
There was a point in time when I was concerned that I wouldn’t even be able to be out of the Hospital to see Santa come. That was an upsetting moment for me. I was trying to figure out how I would explain it to my toddler (who I had barley seen because I just didn’t want her coming to the hospital and being exposed to a ton more germs than she needed to be).
I had gone over all these scenarios in my head and had settled on one where we could ask Santa to come by a different day – so that Mama can be there. I had face timed her as much as I could so I could try and be a part of all the fun Holiday stuff I was missing which certainly helped but still wasn’t comparable.
It all started with my Asthma, but of course all came to a peak right before the holiday. I haven’t had any issues with my Asthma in YEARS so this kind of came out of the blue for me.
There was a point where I was cooking dinner and just couldn’t catch my breath. I felt it coming so I turned the stove off, pushed the spaghetti back as far as I could on the stove and then I just ended up falling to the ground. The problem was I literally couldn’t get myself up.
At this point my daughter comes running into the kitchen because “Mama fall down” and she quickly realizes that something isn’t right and starts to get upset. I felt so bad because I was trying to keep myself calm (having had Asthma my whole life I know this is key) which is hard to do while trying to also keep your child calm.
I ended up literally crawling over to my phone and calling my parents who immediately came over to help me because Andrew was still driving home from work.
I will say I was so proud of my baby girl, because I felt like I asked her to grasp a concept that was too big for her to grasp, but she actually understood that I needed her to be a big girl at that very moment and she was.
Once my parents arrived they helped me to the couch and started to get my stuff to go to the hospital. A few minutes later Andrew arrived home and both Andrew and my dad had to help me to the car because my legs just weren’t working. I remember sitting on the couch and just thinking “move your legs” …and nothing. Eventually I was able to start to move them a little, but once I stood up I had the same issues and would just fall right back down. At one point I’m standing just fine and the next my Husband and Dad are literally lifting me up off of the garage floor and into the car.
I was in and out of the hospital 3 times over a week period.
However, the part that seemed to be stumping everyone was that I was having issues getting air in, not maintaining an oxygen level (which wasn’t spectacular, but we could manage that with medicine). The problem presented itself with me not being able to get a deep breath in. I constantly said I felt like I was stuck in a corset 2 sizes to small and I can just only breath in so far before I just can’t anymore.
This resulted in me constantly being out of breath, even just with talking. Of course this all had to happen over the holidays so the specialist that I actually needed to see wasn’t at the Hospital I was, and for whatever reason I couldn’t be transferred despite me constantly asking to be.
I was given a ton of breathing treatments, about a zillion tests, x-rays and CT scans, and some other things to counteract the side effects of all the medicine they were giving me. Eventually the doctor just said I would need to see a specialist because they were stumped.
Then one resident, who was one who actually cared – you could tell, she spent a lot of time talking with me and my family trying to figure this out – came up with this idea to switch one of my breathing treatments over to one that had a second medication in it. The actual doctor didn’t seem to think much of it but at that point in time I think they would’ve tried magic beans if a fairy godmother poofed into existence with them.
The good news was switching it helped a little.
It wasn’t a cure all but it helped enough so that I would be able to go home and spend Christmas with my baby girl! They came up with a protocol for breathing treatments and medicine that was just something I could do at home. After talking with my doctor I pretty much said that if this is something that I can do at home, and there is nothing else the hospital can do, then I would just prefer to be home. Which they agreed made sense.
So I was finally able to go home.
Of course I still have a lot of appointments in the next few days to try and figure out what is causing the issue because my current way of maintaining it is only a short term plan. Nonetheless I was very happy I was able to see my beautiful daughters face light up with the magic of Christmas Morning!
Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas!
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